Blank Expressions for the Holidays

There are few things that irritate me more than the blank expression of a customer who simply does not understand what you're telling them or looks completely unable to do anything for himself.

Today, we had some woman come to the counter. She was out of her Xanax. We contacted the doctor for refills the day before, but we still didn't get a response. We told her this, and her response was to stare blankly at us without saying a single word. She just stared. She wouldn't move from the counter. Didn't ask what she could do to help. Didn't complain about her doctor's office. She just stared.

I felt like saying to her, "What the fuck do you want us to do?" I bet that would have gotten some response. Or maybe not. Who knows?

I'm a little more sympathetic to the dumb stare when it comes from an elderly person. However, all I can think about when seeing it is if I get that way when I'm old, I want someone to just shoot me.

I'm dead serious. I do not want to be a forgetful, half-retarded old man. I've spent my whole life up to this point having a fairly sharp mind. I can't imagine not being able to grasp simple concepts. I don't want to live a life in which I can't do things for myself. If and when the day comes when my mind deteriorates to that point, I want someone to just put me out of my misery... because I will certainly be miserable at that point.

I look at these people and think that at one time in their lives, they must have been more like me. They must have been young, energetic, and quick-witted. That realization scares me because it just seems inevitable that we all end up that way. That's why I'm doing everything I can now to keep myself healthy and active. If it's in my fate to be just like every other elderly person, then I'm going to fight fate with everything I have.

I simply refuse to be that way.