I guess it was a gradual (some would say it was at a glacial pace) process, but the realization hit me suddenly within the last couple of weeks. "Holy crap! I'm not miserable anymore. I'm actually happy." Not only am I happy, but I'm optimistic. I'm actually looking at the positive side of things instead of constantly dwelling on the negative.
It wasn't a magical transformation. It took a lot of hard work on my part. I didn't set out with happiness in mind. I wanted to take things one step at a time and see where I ended up. The first thing on my agenda was getting healthy and physically fit. I cleaned up my diet. I greatly cut back on most processed foods and anything with added sugar. Then, as I've stated several times in this blog, I started an exercise routine, and I've been pretty consistent. It's been almost 3 months since I started, and I feel more fit than I have in a very long time.
Being healthy and in-shape is a wonderful thing because it not only affects your body but also your mind. It's been pretty well documented that lack of physical activity can lead to depression. There was even a study that came out recently saying that processed foods (i.e. non-whole wheat carbs, and foods with added sugar) were linked to depression. It's become abundantly clear to me that we really are what we eat. If you have a poor diet, you're going to feel like crap mentally and physically.
Becoming healthier changed my entire mood. I just felt better overall. I felt more confident and less miserable. I had more energy, and therefore, I had more desire to go out and do things. I started hanging out with friends more often. I branched out and met some new people. Again, there was no particular goal in mind. I just decided that I no longer wanted to watch life pass me by.
My more active social life ended up expanding my circle of friends. I mentioned a couple months ago how I was dying to go on a vacation. Well, along with one long time friend and a couple other relatively new friends, I booked a vacation in February. It's only a 5 day trip, but I'm very excited for the chance to travel with a bunch of friends to a place I've never been.
I've also been talking to this sweet girl that I met not too long ago. We've hung out several times and talked on several other occasions. She's a very nice person, and I think I just might like her. We'll see how things unfold, but for now I'm just happy that things seem to be falling into place for me for once.
There's that saying "the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results." That was me for all these years. I wrote about my miserable life. I lamented on how I was alone, single, and seemingly going nowhere. I wished things would change. However, I didn't do anything about it. I just sat around hoping for some sort of miracle to fall into my lap and fix all my problems.
Finally, I realized that I had to do something or else I would be doomed to misery for the rest of my life. I didn't have any idea how I wanted things to play out, but I knew that the first changes had to be in myself. Without making those changes, none of this other progress could have occurred.
I move forward from this point without any regrets. I'm happy, hopeful, and looking forward to whatever the future may bring.