The Downside of My Job

As I've stated numerous times, for the most part I like my job. If it were up to me, I'm pretty sure I wouldn't take a different job or switch to a different company. However, there is one downside about my job (and it doesn't have anything to do with my specific company but rather retail pharmacy in general), it's that I come home from work absolutely exhausted every day.

I'm a low energy person. I'm not one of those people that can get up at the crack of dawn every morning, cook breakfast, do a load of laundry, go to the gym, and then work 12 hours. It's simply an impossibility for me. In addition, I rarely have the energy to work a full day then go out afterwards. Usually, I just don't feel up to it.

Work is stressful for me, as it is for most retail pharmacists. I'm in a busy store. There's always plenty of work to do. The phone never stops ringing. Customers are always asking questions. I bounce from place to place try to help everyone I can. For the most part, I can manage the workload, but I always feel on-edge during the day.

Like other pharmacists, I have my own little obsessive tendencies when I work. Everything has to be neat and orderly. I can't give myself even a 2-second break until all the prescriptions are properly filed, all the bottles are put away, every refill from the automated line is done, all the calls are made, etc. Basically, I don't let myself relax until I have done absolutely everything. I don't save things for later. I won't stop in the middle of something to grab a bite to eat. Everything must be done and put away.

Then I come home....

Usually the first thing I do is throw whatever mail I received that day on a table by the door to my apartment. As I type this, I have a couple weeks of unopened mail just sitting there. After taking off my shoes and throwing them in a pile near the door, I go to my computer and check my email. Usually I spend 20 to 30 minutes just sitting in my computer chair surfing the internet for nothing in particular before I get the energy to move again. The next step is changing out of my work clothes. Instead of throwing them right in the laundry or hanging them up, I pile them up on my dresser, where they usually stay for 3 or 4 days before I get the inclination to do something with them.

As for dinner... I'm usually too tired to cook myself something, so unless I have lunch meat to make a sandwich, I'll eat chips or pretzels for dinner. If those just aren't cutting it, I'll order a pizza. Obviously, this isn't exactly the healthiest diet.

Basically, I'm this big slob at home. I don't change the garbage bags in my trash cans until they're practically overflowing. I leave dishes in the sink for days at a time. I have a pile of Drug Topic magazines just sitting on my desk. I originally meant to read through them, but I just never got around to it, so now they just add to the clutter. Other than basketball, which I play once or twice a week, I haven't done any form of exercise in months. Because of this and my horrible diet, I've gained 11 pounds since October.

I was never ever like this before. When I was growing up and even when I was in college, I always liked things to be neat. I made my bed every single day. I always hung up my clothes. I never left papers or books just lying around. I used to exercise (push-ups, crunches, and other stuff like that) daily. However, ever since becoming a pharmacist, I just don't have the energy for it. I've tried to get back to my old habits. I'm usually good for a week or two before I go right back to being lazy again.

My job just sucks the life right out of me. All I can do afterwards is come home and crash. I often complain about my lack of a love-life, but I honestly can't see how I could even have a successful relationship without burning myself out completely. I just don't have the energy to deal with going out, or celebrating birthdays and anniversaries.

Alright... That's all I've got for now.